I was reading an IF blog over the weekend where the blogger was discussing how she felt the insensitivity of her siblings and inlaws grated on her and it got me to thinking.
Is it fair of us IF bloggers to expect others to anticipate what may upset us and compensate? I personally am very much of the opinion this is our thing and we shouldn’t let it cloud the rest of our lives but there are still those moments. Yes, getting a photo of someones newborn baby in the post on a bad day is hard, but I’d rather that, than be excluded from the loop completely.
I really don’t know though if it’s fair to say that because something hurt me it was the wrong thing to do. If I was in the same situation would I do the same… or differently? I couldn’t possibly say.
I also know I am guilty of asking the question “So, are you guys gonna have kids?” bearing no ill will or discomfort to the person I was asking at all. I’m pretty sure we are all guilty of being insensitive.
I’ve decided in myself to cut others a little slack. My siblings, mother and inlaws mean no harm in asking when we are going to start a family. Quite the opposite. They want us to grow and be a happy family I am sure. Instead of closing up when the question comes a more hopeful “Someday soon” may come from my lips. Instead of feeling sad this Fathers day, I felt cheered to have such a positive and lovely father in (out of) law. Instead of seeing us childless, I saw us as children yet to come. Small steps but they all help.
Funnily enough it was Pippy Long Stockings, who I saw depicted on a blog somewhere that kick started that train of thought in a round about way. I used to love her books as a child but I also love Anne of Green Gables. Anne and Pippy loved nothing better than to put a positive spin on things!